A TRIBUTE TO RICK

This Friday marks the seventh year of Rick’s passing. I didn’t get to say the things I would like to have said at his memorial service. In fact, I couldn’t say anything at all. Now that time has passed and I have a blog, I’d like to use it as a forum to pay tribute in a way I was unable to at that time.

            Rick was more than my husband. He was my partner, my soul mate, my cheerleader, and my best friend.  Those who had the good fortune of knowing him will attest to the fact that although he could, at times, drive you crazy, you had to love him and his ‘eccentricities’ (he was so efficient and organized he was sometimes referred to as Mr. Quick-Quick and trash cans were emptied before they were half filled). And he had a nick-name for everyone.

            He was said to have been a musical prodigy at a young age, his first instrument being the trumpet. (Later, he taught himself to play piano by listening to his sister, Robyn, practice her lessons).  In his musical career, he traveled the country with a band called Wonder and was a magnet for investors who believed enough in his talent to back him when he performed in concerts and put out his own recordings. He played various clubs in the Los Angeles area, performed at weddings, and was, with The Rick Rhodes
Band, the house band at Mountaingate Country Club here in L.A.

            I introduced him to the world of soaps when I was writing for As The World Turns; he turned to the TV one day and asked who wrote the music for ‘this junk”.  He worked his way onto the staff of the show, Santa Barbara (sitting in for no pay at the beginning as he learned what was to be expected of him).  He composed music for other television shows as well (including the theme for Guiding Light) Throughout the years, Rick earned 6 Emmy awards and was nominated 24 times. He was also a pioneer in the ‘music library’ business.  Not long ago, ASCAP informed me that Rick was so prolific he had well over a thousand pieces of music registered with them.

            It was Rick who mentored me when I  first wrote lyrics (I still recall his crumpling my first efforts and telling me it was ‘a good start’) and eventually two songs we co-wrote were nominated for Emmy awards. I think some of his best music was that written for a musical we worked on together called UG – A CAVEMAN MUSICAL.

            Rick was more than merely talented; he was very entrepreneurial and had the knack of getting those inclined to say no to say yes.  He was fiercely loyal and trustworthy; he had integrity and would be hurt and dismayed when he found these qualities lacking in others.  His generosity extended not only to me and to his children but to friends and strangers as well. He gave financial and emotional support to many who needed it. One of his proudest contributions was being on the ground floor of the creation of C.L.U.’s Kingsmen Shakespeare Festival, something that is now entering its twelfth year.  He also took great pride in starting Oak Park High School’s drama department, which flourished under his leadership. After his passing, I received numerous letters, some from people I’d never met. They’d begin “You don’t know me but your husband was responsible for giving me my first break in my career”.

            Rick was not perfect.  Who among us are?  But he left an indelible mark on those he met. He cherished his kids and played a huge part in their lives. So much so that I think perhaps my children will have more vivid memories of their father than those whose fathers may have been physically in their lives, but emotionally absent.

            I still find it difficult to listen to his music, but one day I hope that I’ll be able to do so. In the meantime, he remains with me in the anecdotes I still hear told by friends, in the humor and expressions I hear echoed by my daughter, Allie, and in the voice I hear when my son Adam sings, The Wanderer.

            In fact, Rick’s legacy lives on not only in his music, but  in his children as well. He will live in my heart always.

THE NEW YORK WORLD'S FAIR

I was reflecting recently on the demise of the world’s fair.  World’s fairs were once held as regularly as the International Olympics and were looked forward to with the same anticipation.

            The only world’s fair I ever attended was the one held in New York in 1964/1965.  The site was Flushing Meadows, New York and it was one of the largest world’s fairs ever to be held in the United States. (The 1939 world’s fair was also held in New York).

            The theme of the 1964/65 fair was "Peace Through Understanding", dedicated to "Man's Achievement on a Shrinking Globe in an Expanding Universe".  This was somewhat ironic since the fair was to come into conflict with the Bureau of International Expositions (BIE), the international body headquartered in Paris that sanctions world's fairs: BIE rules stated that an international exposition could run for one six-month period only, and no rent could be charged to exhibitors. (In order to make a profit, it was decided that the fair had to run two years). Because of this controversy, many European nations, Canada, Australia, and the Soviet Union did not have an exhibit at the fair.

            Controversy aside, the fair was an incredible and most memorable experience. Just ask any baby boomer fortunate enough to be living in or visiting the New York area at the time. I was pretty young, but I have vivid memories of the fair. I confess, though, I had forgotten about several of the exhibits. Some things I remembered, some I had to be reminded of.

.  The 12-story high, stainless-steel model of the earth called the Unisphere.

.  Getting off the subway station and seeing the fair to the right and Shea Stadium to the left.

.  My first taste of Belgium waffles.

.  My first viewing of “La Pieta” (I saw this again years later when visiting the Vatican).

.  The Clairol Pavillion: (one of my favorites) Women only were permitted in this exhibit. A round glass structure called the “Clairol Color Carousel” had 40 private booths which rotated on a slowly circling turntable. “During a six minute ride in one of the compartments, each of our visitors will be given a complete hair-coloring analysis. Special devices on the Carousel’s steps will show “the ladies” how they would look in various hair shades and styles”.

.  "Dinoland", sponsored by Sinclair Oil, featured life-size replicas of nine different dinosaurs.

.  Futurama: a show in which visitors, seated in moving chairs, glided past elaborately detailed miniature 3D model scenery showing what life might be like in the "near-future"

.  IBM ran a program to look up what happened on a particular date that a person wrote down—for many visitors, this was their first hands-on interaction with a computer.

            The fair also is remembered as the venue Walt Disney used to design and perfect his system of "Audio-Animatronics", in which a combination of electromechanical actuators and computers controls the movement of lifelike robots to act out scenes. (From this came the idea for Ira Levin’s “Stepford Wives”.)

            Some Disney exhibits:

.  At the Illinois pavilion, a lifelike President Abraham Lincoln, recited his famous speeches in "Great Moments with Mr. Lincoln".

.  In "Pepsi Presents Walt Disney's 'It's a small world' - a Salute to UNICEF and the World's Children" at the Pepsi pavilion, animated dolls and animals frolicked in a spirit of international unity accompanying a boat ride around the world. The song was written by the Sherman Brothers.

            (Both of these exhibits would eventually find their way to Disneyland).

            So why no world’s fair any longer?

            The world’s fair presented visions of the distant future: electronic gizmos and appliances that might some day become reality.

            Nowadays, the speed at which one technology replaces another is so great that an exhibit would become obsolete before it opened.

            Those who have visited the New York World’s Fair should consider themselves lucky to have done so.

MOVING DAY

Last month I downsized, moving out of the home in which I had lived and raised my family for twenty years.  It was time to make the move for a multitude of reasons. I was warned by several people that I would miss the house, but surprisingly I haven’t found that to be the case.

            Yes, I miss the house but the house I miss is the house of a decade ago before Rick became ill. The house where we threw great barbeques and parties with music filtering outside to the pool. The house neighborhood kids drifted in and out of. The house where we had huge, memorable New Years Eve parties. While it is true that house no longer exists for me, my memories are with me forever.

            The move was as horrific as everyone said it would be. After months of sifting through the garage, donating, tossing, packing, we were still left with way too much ‘stuff’. I’m not speaking of furniture. That was manageable. It’s the stuff we hold on to through the years: The kids’ artwork, the old greeting cards, the toys (yes, I still had plenty of my grown children’s toys), the memorabilia, the files, etc. So I gave away, donated, and tossed more.

            Finally the weekend of the move arrived along with temperatures ranging from 101 – 106.  I’m not at my finest hour in hot weather and moving just exacerbated the situation.  Between the movers and some very, very helpful friends and family, the move was completed. 

            As I stared at cartons reaching to the ceiling, I decided that some ‘stuff’ would remain in boxes, stored in closets. If and when I move again, I’ll have a head start.

            Here are a few tips for those contemplating a big move:

. Buy lots and lots of tape and boxes…more than you think you’ll need.

. Start getting rid of things early on – garage sales, donations (if you know any young people starting out they’ll be grateful for many of your discards).

. Very important. Pack a separate bag as if you’re going on an overnight trip. In it, place the immediate essentials (ie. appt. book, phone charger, remote controls, make-up, medicine, etc.) You think you’ll remember where you packed things.  Trust me, you won’t.

. Don’t only label the boxes by room; list the content or as much of it as you can.

. Register your change of address with the post office as soon as possible and make any other changes, closing down utility accounts, etc.

. Bring over breakables yourself as much as you are able to (this includes lamps, mirrors, knick-knacks).

. Feed your movers. (And supply lots of bottled water).

. Don’t try to tackle everything at once when you first move in. It will take a few weeks to settle in.

Thanks for joining me on Rhodes Less Traveled,  Vivian

The Jewish New Year

Hi everyone:

I'm back.

Haven't posted on my blog for the past several weeks. I moved and I've been busy settling in (something I'll discuss in a future blog).

I thought that to celebrate the beginning of Rosh Hashonah, the Jewish New Year I'd attach a link to a blog I wrote for The Four Seasons Hotel, Westlake Village: http://family.fourseasons.com/2012/09/to-me-rosh-hashanah-means-new-beginnings-evolving-traditions-brisket%E2%80%94and-family/

L'shana tova (Happy New Year) to all.

Vivian

MOVING

I did not get to post a blog this past week and probably will not get to post again for the next few weeks. Things are a little chaotic at the moment; I’m in the process of moving.

            Moving is considered one of the most stressful times in a person’s life. Right there along side of death in the family and divorce.  My family and I have lived in this house for twenty years. That’s a lot of memory, both good and bad. Mostly good.

            After my husband’s death six and a half years ago, I chose to remain in the house with my son and daughter. We had had enough upheaval for a lifetime and, I believed, we needed this time to heal and regroup.

            Now, with my daughter having moved out and about to get married and with my son on his way, with one foot out the door, the big family home has served its purpose.

            When I informed friends and family that I was going to downsize, I received mixed reactions. Most people understood and encouraged me in taking this next step. Others were, understandably, sentimental about the parties and good times associated with my home.  But unfortunately one can’t remain frozen in time to satisfy the fond memories of other people, as cherished as those memories may be.

            Moving is not easy under any circumstances but going through memorabilia and photos is particularly emotional when you’ve lost a loved one. Also, deciding what to keep, what to donate, what to toss….not easy either.

            Still, with the help of friends and family I’m doing it. At various times I find myself feeling anxious, excited, sad, and hopeful. Cleansing one’s garage is extremely cathartic. We all have way, way too much and can make do with a lot less than we think we can.  I’ll still hold on to the special collectibles, to the precious baby mementos, but, truthfully, I’m looking forward to simplifying my life.

            I’ll be posting again as soon as I get settled. Wish me luckJ

Thanks for joining me on RHODES LESS TRAVELED,

Vivian

           

L.A.'S CHINATOWN

This past month I’ve been privileged to teach two English classes on the Cal Lutheran University campus. It’s part of a program called Upward Bound, which helps high school students, from various parts of Los Angeles, needing that extra leg up. The kids are terrific and it’s been an extremely rewarding experience.

            Yesterday, my teaching assistant and I were permitted to “tag along” as our students, who are also taking a class in Chinese culture, were brought to Chinatown by their two instructors.

            I haven’t been to L.A.’s Chinatown in ages and going by bus rather than having to drive was a particular treat for me. (I’ve always enjoyed bus and train rides --- allows one time to space out).

            When we arrived, we went immediately to a temple. Here, we approached the alter (laden with offerings such as meat and fresh fruit) and partook in a custom involving sticks, stones, and luck.  Fortunately, the number I chose was a lucky one (at least that’s the interpretation I received).

            From there we did some shopping at a nearby plaza and visited a local grocery store. There were an assortment of teas, dried shrimp, and just about anything you’d expect to find at an Asian market.

            We dined at a restaurant called Empress Pavilion where apparently President Clinton and President Bush both dined (at different times I’m assuming).

            The food was ordered for us by our knowledgeable teachers, Christina and Debbie, and it was a feast: numerous appetizers, main courses, and side dishes (noodles, dim sum, lemon chicken, shrimp etc.)

            We shopped a little more and then it was time to return to our ‘normal lives’.

            As I looked around at women walking by,  carrying umbrellas to shield them from the sun, I was reminded how diverse Los Angeles is.

Have a great weekend, and thanks for joining me on Rhodes Less Traveled.

Vivian

THE REAGAN LIBRARY'S DISNEY EXHIBIT

This weekend was a particularly busy one for me and I neglected to write a blog.  I am still pressed for time but my obsessive nature won't allow me to just skip writing one even for one week.

This, then, will be brief.  I merely want to mention the wonderful time I had this past weekend. I brought my daughter's future in-laws and her fiance, as my guests, to the Ronald Reagan Library in Simi Valley.  For those who have never been there I strongly recommend it.  The exhibit itself is fantastic, the docents are knowledgeable, and the view is absolutely spectacular. (Regardless of your political persuasion, it's a trip worth taking).

Aside from the ongoing Reagan exhibit, there is always an adjunct exhibit (Among the exhibits I've seen are: dresses worn by former First Ladies, exercise equipment used by various presidents, a Harley motorcycle exhibit, and the entire collection of the works of Norman Rockwell). Every Christmas, Christmas trees are displayed. Formerly, they represented various countries; more recently they've started displaying Christmas trees that represent decades in America's history.

The adjunct exhibit we attended this weekend was one promoted by Disney fans;  on display was an amazing array of Disney memorabilia: props, costumes, animation --- anything that would tempt a Disneyphile (and who amongst us is not)?

The Disney exhibit will be running through next April so put it on your calendar.  Aside from a walk through Air Force One, make sure to visit the gift shop where one can find a huge assortment of jelly beans, President Reagan's favorite candy.

Thanks for joining me on Rhodes Less Traveled,

Vivian